Good Girl, Goodbye

Stop chasing gold stars and start chasing the life you really want. We’ve spent years being the good girl: saying yes when we mean no, shrinking ourselves to make others comfortable and prioritising everyone else’s needs. Our conditioning to be ‘good’ runs deep. As children, we’re praised for being polite, quiet and well-behaved. In the workplace, we’re rewarded for compliance over confidence. The result? Chronic illness, burnout, buried emotions — and a feeling that we’re constantly performing for other people, rather than living a life that is true to us. In Good Girl, Goodbye, Caitlin Judd — founder of the award-winning lady-brains podcast — offers a bold roadmap to break the patterns keeping us small. Drawing from her work coaching thousands of women, interviewing Australia’s best female founders, and her background in business and positive psychology, Judd shows women how to set fierce boundaries and build a life they love. You’ll learn how to: Identify the 12 Good Girl archetypes stealing your peace, energy and confidence Say no without guilt and set healthy boundaries Stop sacrificing your truth to keep others comfortable Discover your strengths and reclaim your personal power Use practical tools and a change framework to define what true success means to you Good Girl, Goodbye is for the women who are tired of chasing gold stars in systems and institutions that don’t value who they really are. Whether you’re a perfectionist, a people-pleaser or a shapeshifter, this book hands you the permission slip you’ve been waiting for to choose yourself — without apology.

About the Author ix Author's Note xi Introduction xv Part I The Foundations 1 1 Meet the Good Girl 3 2 The Systems That Weren't Built for Us 19 3 The Shaping of the Good Girl 45 4 The Good Girl Archetypes 57 Part II The Cost 67 5 The Beliefs and Behaviours That Keep Us Small 69 6 The Hidden Sacrifices 79 7 Being a Good Girl Hurts 105 Part III The Unbecoming 113 8 An Invitation to Create Change 115 9 B — Believe in Yourself and in Change 125 10 U — Unbecome to Become 145 11 I — Integrate Through Play and Practice 153 12 L — Loop Through Feedback 163 13 D — Design and Build Your Future 171 14 E — Environmental and Energy Shifts 183 15 R — Relationships to Hold You Up 193 Part IV The Rebuilding 207 16 Building Your New System 209 17 Raising Girls to Know Their Worth 227 18 Everyday Acts of Rebellion 237 19 Good Girl, Goodbye 251 Conclusion: The Other Side of Girlhood 257 Acknowledgements 263 Further Resources 265 Reference List 267