Cold Intimacies

It is commonly assumed that capitalism has created an a-emotional world dominated by bureaucratic rationality; that economic behavior conflicts with intimate, authentic relationships; that the public and private spheres are irremediably opposed to each other; and that true love is opposed to calculation and self-interest. Eva Illouz rejects these conventional ideas and argues that the culture of capitalism has fostered an intensely emotional culture in the workplace, in the family, and in our own relationship to ourselves. She argues that economic relations have become deeply emotional, while close, intimate relationships have become increasingly defined by economic and political models of bargaining, exchange, and equity. This dual process by which emotional and economic relationships come to define and shape each other is called emotional capitalism. Illouz finds evidence of this process of emotional capitalism in various social sites: self-help literature, women's magazines, talk shows, support groups, and the Internet dating sites. How did this happen? What are the social consequences of the current preoccupation with emotions? How did the public sphere become saturated with the exposure of private life? Why does suffering occupy a central place in contemporary identity? How has emotional capitalism transformed our romantic choices and experiences? Building on and revising the intellectual legacy of critical theory, this book addresses these questions and offers a new interpretation of the reasons why the public and the private, the economic and the emotional spheres have become inextricably intertwined.

Acknowledgments vi 1 The Rise of Homo Sentimentalis 1 Freud and the Clark lectures 5 A new emotional style 16 The communicative ethic as the spirit of the corporation 18 The roses and thorns of the modern family 24 Conclusion 36 2 Suffering, Emotional Fields, and Emotional Capital 40 Introduction 40 The self-realization narrative 43 Emotional fields, emotional habitus 62 The pragmatics of psychology 67 Conclusion 71 3 Romantic Webs 74 Romancing the Internet 75 Virtual meetings 76 Ontological self-presentation 79 Fantasy and disappointment 95 Conclusion: A new Machiavellian move 108 Notes 115 Index 130